"Maybe"

I decided to do my analysis on the song "Maybe" by Kelly Clarkson. I sang this song (well part of it...) on the last day before spring break at the Night of Noise, which was an open-mic event held to give a voice to those in the LGBT community, for those who don't know about it. I did it mostly out of wanting to sing, however to respect the meaning behind the event, I decided it would be best to choose a song that had some kind of relevance to the whole point of it. So as a last minute decision, I chose this song, but I did it purely based of emotions that I thought could be applied to this specific situation. I thought it would only be appropriate to really look at the song and think about it, perhaps even figure out why I felt it was a good song to sing that night. The lyrics:

I'm strong
But I break
I'm stubborn
And I make plenty of mistakes
Yeah I'm hard
And life with me is never easy
To figure out, to love
I'm jaded but oh so lovely
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe

Someday
When we're at the same place
When we're on the same road
When it's OK to hold my hand
Without feeling lost
Without all the excuses
When it's just because you love me, you let me, you need me
Then maybe, maybe
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe

I'm confusing as hell
I'm north and south
And I'll probably never have it all figured out
But what I know is I wasn't meant to walk this world without you
And I promise I'll try
Yeah I'm gonna try to give you every little part of me
Every single detail you missed with your eyes
Then maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe

One day
We'll meet again and you'll need me, you'll see me completely
Every little bit
Oh yeah maybe you'll love me, you'll love me then

I don't want to be tough
And I don't want to be proud
I don't need to be fixed and I certainly don't need to be found
I'm not lost
I need to be loved
I just need to be loved
I just want to be loved by you and I won't stop 'cause I believe
That maybe, yeah maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe

I should know better than to touch the fire twice
But I'm thinking maybe, yeah maybe you might

Maybe, love maybe

The first verse sounds a lot of like a confession, giving in to the inevitability of human imperfection. The speaker admits she (using "she" since the singer is female) is far from perfect, that she can still break, make mistakes and she mentions how difficult she can be, but she still believes that she can be loved despite her flaws if a person chooses to accept them and take her for who she is ("All you have to do is hold me, and you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be if you'll trust me, love me, let me, maybe..").

The entire second verse is somewhat like hopeful thinking of the time that she and the person who she is singing to will come to terms with one another ("when we're at the same place, when we're on the same road, when it's ok to hold my hand") Though it may seem like the song is being sung to a lover, I believe when she says "trust me, love me, let me, maybe" she is singing to someone who disapproves of her for some unspecified reason (one of her imperfections), and this is her saying, "Maybe if you gave me a chance, you would understand me and my reasons why, and you would learn to love me [accept me]."

At the bridge, the speaker says, "But what I know is I wasn't meant to walk this world without you" hints that the person this song is directed to is important to her in some way. Also, when she says, "Yeah I'm gonna try to give you every little part of me, every single detail you missed with your eyes, then maybe, maybe, yeah maybe" she is saying that there's more to her than the flaws that the person she is addressing can't seem to embrace. Finally towards the end the lines, "I don't need to be fixed and I certainly don't need to be found, I'm not lost, I need to be loved" mean that these flaws aren't necessarily wrong and they just make the speaker who she is, and she just wants to be loved for being herself.

The entire song in general is about asking to be accepted and loved. It's probably for that reason that I decided to sing this at the Night of Noise.

On the reservation.....

....the sky is the best we've got. The land is red, may it be from our history of bloody suffering that still haunts us now, or just the weather as they say, I don't know. It is red where there should be green from the money we get from the government. It's so barren and dull I'm amazed I'm still here. The shoddy little "houses" dot the scarlet landscape, each having its own arbitrary and unique shape; they're the only things ornamenting the land.

There's no room for a chance at life, even with the all open space we have that seems to only end only with the sky. Many already have given up and made their way to the heavens against God's will because they can't seem to find a way around this struggle. The poverty and lack of opportunity deprived people of their spirit and desire to live on. The hate from the outside world. So much conflict....

I want to be one of the red mountains because they are so close to the large expanse of blue above. Maybe I will find my way to the sky too.

Propaganda 2011

prop·a·gan·da

1. information, ideas, or rumors deliberately spread widely to help or harm a person, group, movement, institution, nation, etc.

 

2.  the deliberate spreading of such information, rumors, etc.

 

3. the particular doctrines or principles propagated by an organization or movement.

 

"Propaganda" is usually applied to political matters. But with this definition, wouldn't most of what we encounter be considered propaganda?

 

All the advertisements on TV, on billboards, on the bus, on the train; the magazines with their "miracle weight loss" guides and the fads of the season. The internet that has EVERYTHING you're looking for. They all have some sort of direction, or message they want to get to people who see them. 

I would have to say that even the things we are taught to be "good" or "bad", that is also a form of propaganda. There's the common logic (?) we're all expected to know and understand, but I feel that these basic ideas we are taught shape the way we see other more complex, and perhaps more controversial topics of the world, which is the more direct and obvious form of propaganda. 

So pretty much, everything is propaganda in its own way. 

Just want to put it out there: I despise politics.

 

"Black Boy" Response

Best book of the year, hands down. The plot is honest, frank, understandable and flows, and there are certain points made in the book that readers can easily relate to.

I really like Wright's style of writing. In general, it uses simple words and sentence structures to convey some very complex ideas, and a significant amount of it is delivered through dialogue. I also feel that he is trying to speak out about his opinions through his experiences. I think that he does a great job at it, because these experiences he goes through in his life time are put together nicely and timed well. Nothing ever drags on for too long, but I am still able to get a clear picture and idea of what is going on.

Reading about his origins and life as a child, and then comparing that to how he turned out is really impressive and admirable. He grew up in an abusive household under extremely religious and strict authority. His education was broken and it was quite a while before he became literate, yet he ended up writing a book as great as this one. This was probably what stuck out to me the most. I am a fairly realistic person, but this book has me thinking that maybe passion and perseverance can get you places in life.

Hungry For Attention: Is young Richard alone in his cravings?

In the first chapter of Black Boy by Richard Wright, he reminisces a few memorable experiences, many of which, if not all, expressing a certain hunger for something. There was the literal hunger, when he asks his mother for food, but there was also the hunger for attention at the beginning of the book when he sets the house on fire, as well as a hunger to entertain himself. There was a hunger to learn, a hunger to rebel. 

Everyone wants something. It's why there's so much greed and suffering in the world. They may be entirely different from Richard's; they may be as complex as his desire for attention or as simplistic as his hunger for food. But there is no one in the world that is completely satisfied with what they have. It's just human nature. The cravings of the other characters of the book, such as his mother's and his brother's, are hinted at to prove this, although they are not as obvious as Richard's.

So no, Richard isn't alone in his cravings.

"On Being Mexican American" Response

I feel I can somewhat relate to Mendoza's experience. I was born in the US, just like him, but I was born Chinese, as he had said he was born Mexican. However, I did grow up in China where my native culture is strongest. At that age, things like race, culture, ethnicity, labels in general, none of those really mattered to me. I wasn't particularly aware that I was Chinese. I simply lived the way I was taught to.
It was when I moved back here and started school that I began to notice certain things. My class (with the exception of kindergarten to about third grade) was made up of a majority of African Americans and Hispanics. I suppose I always knew I was different, but it became more apparent and obvious as teachers talked about ideas like diversity and tolerance, the like, and even the small things like the different ways people talked that I picked up too brought it to surface. Both Mendoza and I learned of our biological identities through schooling.
Unlike Mendoza though (since I'm much younger than him), I became 'aglocized' when I came to Whitney Young, so even before I was a teenager. My class was much more diverse than what I was accustomed to, and it took some time to adapt. But I did. An old friend of mine would always tell me every time she sees me, "You've changed a lot. I don't know you anymore." Of course, we still love each other, and she didn't mean anything bad by that, but I can see what she means even on my own. The crazy arguments I get into with my mother are solid evidence of this (what they are about I will leave out of this).
The line that stuck out to me the most in this piece was, "We need to decide once and for all who we are and stop trying to be what we are not." I believe in a balance that we must all find as well. This was very wise of him to say. I hope I find mine.

King Still King?

 In "Letter from a Birmingham Jail" by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr, he discusses his ideas of a nonviolent campaign to bring about the "tension" to surface, so negociation would be possible, why breaking the law in doing so is not contradictory nor wrong because of the "two types of laws: just and unjust", that "groups tend to be more immoral than individuals", among others. I believe these beliefs still stand very true today, but not quite in the context they are used.

2011. Internet, phones, TV, all very efficient means of communication to help people learn about one another. The Civil Rights Movement is over, and immigration had increase more and more over the years. The United States has never been more diverse. Racism and prejudice obviously still exists, but it is illegal on paper, and it is not an every day aspect of our lives. There is no longer a need for any protest because we are all llegally equal. However, King's ideas can still be applied to other fields that have not seen the improvement or progress wanted. An example of a nonviolent effort would be the Walk-Out from last year. It was brought up in class yesterday. It was peaceful, although unlawful. In the end it did make a difference, because many of the teachers who were supposed to leave never did.

So I guess King really is still King.